From the Boomers Modesto website:
“Our 18-hole miniature golf courses present a challenge for any age. Lush greens, wild waterfalls and wacky windmills are just a few of the obstacles that stand between you and golfing immortality.”
“I recently heard a man, while explaining how a person could convert to Christianity, say the experience was not unlike deciding to sit in a chair. He said that while a person can have faith that a chair will hold him, it is not until he sits in the chair that he has acted on [...]
Note To Self: If you become President, don’t say things like, “What? $4 dollars per gallon of gas? I haven’t heard that…”
“Just remember, kids: Religions are like lampshades. They might all look different, but they all have the light of God on the inside.”
OK, but I’ll bet that some of them are working with a lower wattage than others.
“If I had eyes in the back of my head, I would have told you you looked good as I walked away.”
- Jack Johnson
Yesterday, listening to election coverage, I heard a politician on the radio refer to “The Evil that attacked us on 9/11.”
I had this post going for a bit about how ascribing Proper Abstract Nouns to guys who want to kill Americans is silly and clouds our judgment. Then I realized I hate writing about war. [...]
“Everyone who met God in the Bible was afraid of Him. People were afraid of even the angels, so the angels always had to calm people down just to have a conversation. I would think that would be very annoying if you were an angel, always having to settle people down just to talk. It [...]
“Wake Up Call: Sorry there, handball, but you’re just tennis for poor people.”
Stephen Colbert, I Am America (And So Can You!)
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